February 29, 2012

...Learn TDD with Codemanship

The Maturity Model Maturity Model (MMMM)

There are various maturity models in this business of wares that we call "soft". Maturity models fulfil a vital role in providing reassurance to managers who have no intention of actually improving anything ever, as well as providing incomes for consultants who might otherwise starve or be forced to work in the sex industry or something or other.

But there's a glaring hole in the maturity model market, namely that there's no maturity model for maturity models.

Fear not, though, as tonight I'm going to fill that glaring hole with my own Maturity Model Maturity Model (MMMM)

MMMM has 5 levels of maturity:

Level 1 - Ad hoc: You have invented a method or process that teams are pretending to adopt, but have yet to provide any guidance on how effectively they are pretending to adopt it.

Level 2 - Certifying: You offer training and certification in your method or process that informs organisations that people are properly qualified to pretend to adopt it

Level 3 - Certifier Certifying: You offer training and certification to people that lets organisations know that they are qualified to train and certify other people in the effective pretence of adopting your method or process

Level 4 - Upselling: You offer certification of whole organisations as well as individual people in the effective pretence of adopting your method or process. You have a checklist of things organisations must appear to be doing (evidenced by them having a document somewhere that says that they do it) that creates the convincing impression that they have actually adopted your method or process.

Level 5 - Reproducing: You offer certification to organisations that tells other organisations that they are qualified in the certification of organisations in the effective pretence of adopting your method or process, as well as certifying organisations in the certification of certifying organisations.

Level 6 - Expanding: You offer certification in things you know nothing about that are tenuously connected with the adoption of your method or process (e.g., the Correct Use Of Office Furniture Maturity Model), and continue to add arbitrary levels of maturity up to and including "Level Infinity - Transcendent Beings Of Pure Energy & Thought". Level 6 of MMMM is, of course, an illustration of Level 6 of MMMM.

Posted 2 weeks, 4 days ago on February 29, 2012