February 2, 2014
Announcing Codemanship Developer Suite - Architect EditionIntroducing the new Codemanship Developer Suite - Architect Edition.
If you are a developer, DO NOT READ BEYOND THIS POINT. The following text is for non-technical budget holders only.
For an annual fee of £500,000 (not including sales tax, maintenance and catering), Codemanship Developer Suite - Architect Edition will solve all of your software development problems, and some problems that don't even have anything to do with developing software, like male-pattern baldness and erectile dysfunction.
Codemanship Developer Suite - Architect Edition does this by putting you in the driving seat, removing all key technical decisions from your developers, who are probably incompetent because they keep telling you that creating a social media site with all the features of Faceboook can't be done in 4 weeks.
Codemanship Developer Suite - Architect Edition comes as a tightly-integrated family of tools that take the guesswork out of making shit up as you go along.
* Enterprise Text Manipulation & Management allows architects to precisely capture the logic of your software and systems in textual form that can be shared among developers. Choose among dozens of available logic specification languages, including Java, C#, C++, Visual Basic, Ruby, PHP and Python.
* Cloud-based Text File History Management "Git" Hub allows teams to share their logic specifications and maintain a history of all changes for audit purposes. It's good because it's in the cloud.
* Automated Executable Software Generation directly from textual descriptions of the software's logic targeted at a wide variety of compatible platforms
* Automated Testing & Verification & Test Suite Management using the exact same logic specification languages used to describe the software itself, greatly reducing the testing learning curve.
* Team Architecture Management tools that have been proven to work over thousands of years. (Pencils not included.)
* Gratuitous & Highly Misleading Reports Of Development Activities for that comforting illusion of control
Our objective and entirely plausible studies have shown that teams can expect a return on investment of up to 10,000,000%, meaning that most businesses will become immensely wealthy purely as a result of buying Codemanship Developer Suite - Architect Edition.
But don't take our word for it; here's some eyewitness testimony from an entirely real customer who really uses it:
"Since moving to Codemanship Developer Suite, my daughters nightmares have abated and we no long suffer at the hands of the poltergeist who has haunted us since 1977." - Mortimer D. Batmobile, Head of Development, S.P.E.C.T.R.E.
To find out more about Codemanship Developer Suite - Architect Edition and to arrange a trial demonstration, click here
Posted 8 years, 4 months ago on February 2, 2014