July 9, 2009
RFP for Software Crapmanship 2009In recent years, thanks to the efforts of people like Robert "Uncle Steve" Martin, Kent "Cousin Daisy" Beck and Martin "Martin Fowler" Fowler, code is getting better. It's been getting more reliable, more streamlined and - most worryingly - more maintainable.
If the trend continues our gravy train is in very real danger of being permanently derailed. For decades we have enjoyed the fruits of our crappiness. Badly cut code, riddled with duplication, redundancy, unmanaged dependencies and other kinds of income-protecting complexity has ensured a continuous and bounteous income stream for the jobbing software hack.
We at the Institute of Mortgage-driven Development are working tirelessly to stem the growing tide of simplicity and readability that threatens to turn our once endless stream of money-for-old-rope off at the source.
To this end, we are organising the first international conference dedicated to the principles and practices that decades of experience have taught us leads to crappy, unmaintainable software.
Although an exact date and venue has yet to be selected, we want to give you this early opportunity to help set the direction of the conference by submitting session proposals and papers for our consideration.
Software Crapmanship 2009 will be held in the autumn, almost certainly somewhere in London. Although we can't say at this point precisely what kind of venue will be chosen, we are certain that alcoholic beverages will be served on the premises, and that - to ensure you don't miss out on those all-important billable hours - will be held in the evening. Registration will probably cost £10 on the door, and all profits will go to the Bletchley Park Trust.
Sessions will be limited to 20 minutes in length to cater for short attention spans. Sessions involving Ruby and/or naked or scantily-clad ladies will not be considered.
You can submit your session abstracts to email@example.com
Join us and together we can keep code crappy
Software Crapmanship 2009 is a Boffoonery production
Posted 11 years, 2 months ago on July 9, 2009